I just found out that

My mom hasn't loved my dad for the last 20 years of their 30 year marriage.

She just "fell out of love." Seriously. Yuck.

Their anniversary is tomorrow.

It'll probably be their last together.

My mom told the Husband a bit about it a few weeks ago and he told me last night.

It's not much of a surprise. I've felt for a few years now like my mom doesn't even like my dad. Doesn't respect him. Thinks everything he says or does is stupid. I don't know why.

I haven't talked to my mom about it yet. It's weird for me to be on the phone with her now because she doesn't know I know.

I realize now that all my passive-aggressive tendencies in my marriage come from her.

Twenty years? Twenty years of trying to love him, or twenty years of resenting him? She apparently has been ready to leave for quite some time but has had trouble convincing my dad to let go.

I think I'm still in shock. I haven't cried yet. I also haven't talked to my parents about it. I live far away from them, so I don't really know them as a unit anymore. I have a relationship with each parent, independent of the other. Honestly, the thing that saddens me the most is how it will affect their relationships with my own kids.