About my mom

I talked to my mom the other day on the phone. It was close to dinner time, and I was saying that I wasn't sure what I was going to cook. I told her I wanted to make something the Husband really liked because his job has really been stressful of late. I've been trying to make life at home as good as it can be since his job sucks.

My mom said, "Well, you know, you do what you can."

Like the idea of doing something nice for her husband was very foreign to her.



And no, nothing about their marriage has ever come up in conversation. I've decided that if she's not going to talk about it, then I'm not either. I mean, what could I say? "So, have you decided if you're leaving Dad or not?"

She's talked about the possibility of going to beauty school -- becoming a hairdresser. But it'll cost a lot of money. I have a feeling she's considering it so she'll have income in the event of a divorce. She's come to me for advice or just my thoughts on the matter and I can't tell her what I think.

Because what I think is this: If she's doing it to fulfill herself, fine.

If she's doing for a safety net, I DON'T WANT HER TO HAVE A SAFETY NET.

Now, I obviously don't have all the facts on their marriage. But I did live with them for 18 years, and have observed quite a bit as an adult. My dad adores my mom. He lives his life to make her happy. He helps around the house, tries to be romantic, cooks, and is funny. He is more passive as a parent, which I know is frustrating for my mom.

But to my knowledge, my father has never cheated. He has never beat any member of his family. The harshest I ever remember him being was when I was 8 years old. We were on family vacation, sleeping in a hotel. My brother and I weren't going to sleep and just kept giggling all night. My dad yelled at us to SHUT UP. And we did. But that is the only time I remember his raising his voice or using "harsh" language.

I don't know why my mom feels the way she does. I realize that I don't know the details of their marriage, so I probably shouldn't judge.

But its my parents. And I don't know how they are going to end up.